A quiet Christmas at home.... not what we had planned.

Well it was another Christmas we missed out on. All started well, and even made it to church. Kids were happy and jumping around and wasn't till we got home that Master N threw up, just got him into the toilet in time. He also had runny poos as well. Welcome back Gastro. Poor kid this was his second time with it. But he was ok and was soon over it, but still had to cancel as we did not want to pass the germs onto family.

So l cracked it a tad, and wanted nothing to do with the day. Wasn;t interested in presents or spending time with the family. I jsut sulked. I was annoyed that we had missed out on another Christmas. Christmas 2009 was def the worst ever. At least last year we were eating and happy.... just had to cancel as we did not want to pass germs on.

Our meal was sausages.. plain sausages.. no bread left to have with the snags... not that l even really cared. We all ended up being in bed by 8:30pm....

Not a Chrismtas l ever want to face like that again.

Merry Christmas

Just wanted to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and may it be a safe and a happy one.

How much longer

I am not sure whether to laugh or cry, pull my hair out or just run away and pretend this week never happened.

I can't keep up with Miss T and whatever she seems to have. Mr N had her back at ER this morning as she had gone down hill (well really from 5pm yesterday) and typical child Miss T is was fine in ER, talking and would not sit still so of course the dr's must think we are mad and paranoid parents. Well she did throw up on the way to ER.

On Monday night they said she had an ear infection when Mr N took her to ER, and gave her some medicine to have a home. That is what they think may have been making her sick. So we have stopped that now. But again she just threw up and it has been a few hours since she last had that medicine (well at 8am this morning)... so no idea why she is still throwing up.

She is happy now and in her room, she attempted an icy pole but soon got sick of it.

I am just worn out thinking she is over it and then have her go downhill again. Christmas is getting closer and closer and less days for her to get better, we will have to cancel christmas again this year.

I am just so over vomit, washing dirty linen, trying to keep Master N entertained ( he has been lost without his sister) and dealing with Miss T and trying to fit in other things like finishing the Christmas shopping and general housework.

I am so moody and blaming poor Mr N that he did not make them give Miss T and IV and other silly little things.

Please please all l want for Christmas is a healthy family.... please.....

I am so over 2009... bring on 2010

I am so over this year.. and Christmas already.

Miss T was slowly on the improve yesterday, wandering around and wanting food and drink, not that she had much to eat ( a spoonful of jelly), and has been having that hyrdalite. But she started to vomit again around 8pm so called nurse-on -call and their advice was to take her to ER to get checked out.

DR said it was an ear infection, but l think she did have gastro as well. Certain it was gastro as well as now Master N has been vomiting too, no warning and all over the carseat and himself.. (thanks).

So both are in bed now, Miss T is asleep and Master N is in and out, trying to get him to sleep and have a rest... think l have a challenge with him.

Now just waiting to see if Christmas will be cancelled this year.... I am trying to not let it get to me but l can't. We missed out on a lot last year due to all of us having gastro and it seems it has hit us again.. same time....

We do not get to see my family enough as it is, and now again another christmas cancelled. Hard not to be upset and down about it all.

I HATE gastro.

So now both myself and Mr N are timebombs.... i am sure we will come down with it....

Merry Spewy Christmas...

Bah humbug

Bah humbug

Blah.

It seems the gastro bug has reared its ugly head again. Poor Miss T was to get it again and this is the worst she has ever been with it. She has been sick since noon yesterday and is now finally sleeping.

Odd how we all had this excatley the same time last year, and Christmas was cancelled. I am hoping it is not a re-occurance again. Twice in a row is enough- maybe cancel Christmas all together.

Mr N is home today to look after Master N, he does not seem to be any worse and is full of energy and telling Mr N what he wants to do. Good to see some bonding time with the boys of the house.

So gives me a chance to focus my care of little Miss T and catch up on all the washing, and even catch up on some sleep if l get a chance.

So much for a great start to Christmas 2009.

I am having a bit of a self pity party.... its just not fair.... and did question God why these things happen.... not really my place to question God.

Reminds me that l am lucky to have my daughter and there are others out there worse off then us who won't be celebrating Christmas this year. When l heard of the news this morning about the little boy (6 years old) who was hit while playing in his fenced garden with his mother and two teenagers by a drunk driver. What a sad time of year for that family, and all b'c of some idiot who thought he could drink and drive.....

Makes you thankful for what you do have. Just think about it.

this time of year. Blah

True madness... words can't explain.

But this time of year certainly brings out the madness in families. I always thought Christmas meant a time for families and loved ones to get together and spend time together. Well maybe in the past, but in 2009 it is so hard to even get the smallest family together. There is just no time the family can agree a time to all meet up, share a meal together and just enjoy each other. Except they go ahead and just leave us out.

I don't care really as l can't relate to them and just see them for my kids and Mr N's sake (after all they are his family). But they are getting him down lately. I would be rich for everytime he said (in the past month) that he is over his family. It has been almost a month since he contacted them about a problem and they still have no contacted him back. And this is a family who has always said "if there is something you want to discuss we are always here". Yer right.

They have no time for him or our kids. I guess we are lucky that the kids are too young to understand what is happening. I can just see a reacurance from my grandparents. They never had much time for my siblings or me. I grew up and it was normal but l know today it still upsets my mum. Guess it is happening all over again but this time with the inlaws.

Being a christian family too we should know better and do the right thing and show love, and forgivness.... I wish we could just walk away and do our own thing. But thats not the christian attitude. But how can you keep going and kept being hurt and brought down. I mean they don't care if they are hurting us, they can't say sorry as they do not even think they have done anything wrong (from the last time we spoke to them - or tried). So how can you fix a problem if the other person can't even be aware of it. The situation l can't see changing.

I am just not sure where to go from here other then to keep supporting Mr N in this and giving him the love he needs.

Funny how at this time of year it always brings everything out in the open. Not sure how many more Christmas's this can keep going on.

Begining to hate this time of year and families....

What a week it has been

I am so glad this week is over. The week certainly has been a challenge. Didn't help that Mr N had to work all weekend, and when he was at home he was either on the phone or walking around in a zombie state. That would do it having to work at 3am on a Saturday morning. He has not even had time to himself.

And don't they say when the 'cats away the mice will play'. Very true here. Both Miss T and Master N have been a challenge. So much so that l ended up in tears on Monday, and those that know me l never cry, and if l do l usually do it in the shower or in bed during the night where no one can see me.

It's a funny thing to do. I am not sure why l hide when l cry or not let anyone see me crying. It's nothing to be ashamed of. But to me if l cry l feel like l have lost control over myself. I like to be in control, not of everyone but just of myself.

Poor Mr N did not know what to say or do with me on the phone crying and ranting and raving. But Master N certainly knows how to push buttons.

Master N had his graduation ceremony on Monday night. Not that he is graduating till next year but they were all involved and were singing songs to the parents. It was very cute, they were singing the song 'Singing in the rain' which had actions and their was a chorus of giggles when they got to the bottom action.

I didn't really feel like going, espically after the horrid day l had with Master N. But then me sitting around and moping around the house was just not like me so off Master N and l went. Didn't help that Mr N was home late and we had literally 10mins to leave (he hadn't even had tea). So he stayed home with Miss T.

A week full of parties. We had the playgroup break up on Tuesday, l did let Master N go, seriously was thinking of cancelling it for him. But then was better to go out and let him let off some energy then have him climbing the walls and myself pulling my hair out.

And with Mr N working so much, he was off first thing in the morning and did not even get home till 9pm some evenings. Did get a bunch of flowers as a way of saying sorry.

Surviving and thriving.....

Well l did write a post yesterday but wasn't sure how you could link it to the same area where my other blog is. When l found out how to do it l had already written it but wasn't able to copy and paste it to over here. So it is now lost somewhere on the big web.

I wanted a blog where l could write whatever l am feeling or just need to vent without having to worry about family reading about it. Not wanting to cause problems or even bitch about events or people but l believe you need to get things off your chest and vent away at times. A lot healthier then bottling it all up and it then justs builds up so much so that you end up exploding.

It's either that or you just bore your friends with your woes and complaints, they soon do not want to hear your daily whinges/problems. I think they would love to lend an ear as the saying goes, afterall thats what friends are for, but l would not want to burden them with my dull daily problems. Not that l get them very often.

Went to church this morning, didn't want to be there. Well not that l wanted to be there, just felt like l was no in the right state of mind for being there. How can one walk into a church after whinging about a certain family memeber (s) with your husband in the car on the way to church, and then walk into church as if nothing is wrong. Not a very good start nor very Christian like.

Mr.N was on kids church today, and they had practice for the Christmas Concert coming up, so he got off easy as it meant no lesson to prepare. Was glad the kids were at kids church today, they were very testing at the start of church and l am sure they had ants in their pants as they just could not sit still nor be quiet. Well in Miss T's case anyhow.

Pastor L spoke today, and l really enjoyed it. The topic was " How to survive and thrive as a Christian". And talking about how we need spiritual food and water to survive as a christian in the world. Was great to listen to and l needed to hear it.

Life as a christian has its up and downs, and learning a lot more about sspending more time with God in prayer, and the word and this is where you are spiritually fed. And he related it to how we need food and drink to live, well as christians we need spiritual food to live as a christian, in order to grow.

Have been listening to Joyce Meyer over the last few weeks and have found her messages/teachings both inspiring and uplifting. I know l just need to make more time in order for me to grow.

Another thing, which has been bothering us all, and seems to just get harder and harder each year is trying to get everyone together for a Christmas meal with Mr.N's side of the family. Yet again another drama this year in people not listening to the dates we have listed as NOT being available and telling them 4 different times that we can't make those dates. Yet they still made them on those dates.

I won't go into it much in here, but it is very frustrating espcially to see Mr.N hurt by it all. Not sure if the meaning "families" have the same meaning these days or don't seem to hold the same importance in someones life.

Mr.N wrote a letter last week to them and was open and honest, and yet there has been no reply, no phone and no appology. So now what.... Its hard to know what to do and at times living in another state is very very appealing.

Anyhow thats my vent (very small and low key.... l could go on and on but don't want to go there).

At least l would rather focus my attention on growing spiritually and getting my spiritual food.

My first post

Damn can't seem to copy and paste from another blog.....